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5 Comments
I used to think loneliness is only for foreigners, but now I realized that it is for everyone. (But still more intensive for foreigners) This country needs a huge transformation in its culture and society.
Because many people never learned how to be alone and how to entertain themselves. Not just young people either.
Ahh loneliness in Germany—it’s such a strange topic, isn’t it? Like, it feels almost taboo to even talk about sometimes. Us people here value our privacy so much, and there’s this unspoken rule to not bother others. It’s like, everyone’s polite but distant. You can have neighbors for years and barely know their names.
And we aren’t exactly known for small talk or spontaneity, so even starting a conversation can feel like breaking some unwritten law. It’s not that people don’t care—we do—but the culture leans more towards keeping to oneself unless there’s a very clear reason to connect. Friendships here often take time, like real time, to build, and until then, it can feel pretty isolating.
What makes it harder is how structured everything is. Social plans are often made weeks in advance, so if you’re feeling lonely on a Friday night, good luck finding someone who’s free for a spontaneous hangout. And don’t even get me started on winter—always rainy like + gets dark at like 3 p.m., and that just makes everything feel ten times heavier.
But at the same time, there’s this thing about us: once we do connect with someone, it’s usually genuine. Germans don’t do surface-level friendships as much. So yeah, it’s tough to break in, but when you do, it’s worth it. And I’ve noticed more people are starting to open up about loneliness now, especially after COVID. Maybe we’re slowly moving towards a bit more warmth in the everyday. It’s not perfect, but it’s something 🌼
I experienced an overwhelming sense of isolation during my time in Germany, particularly on weekends. Interestingly, I found myself feeling somewhat happier as the week progressed toward Monday.
Just give me a lot better work/life balance and a chance to prosper financially, then i might think about looking for a partner and maybe getting kids. Else its just me till death i guess.